Eight days have gone by since one more medication change. The last one caused me to gain 45 pounds almost two years ago. Last Saturday ringing in my ears, “loopiness” – a feeling of being in outer space, not finding the words I wanted to say, and dizziness dominated my inner being. I went to church at 5:00 with Eric and wondered how many people looked at me thinking, “What a lovely woman, so put together!”

God encouraged me during the service. “This, too will pass and you are on your way to new things”, I felt Him lovingly say. My tears flowed as my heart ached.

I do want this to be over. I do want to feel alive again. The medication I have been on has left me exhausted and not being able to wake up until 10 or 11 in the morning. Half of Eric’s (my husband) day is already accomplished by the time I arise.

Maybe this will be the one! My doctor, also wants me to change to a different night time drug. He does his best to comply with my request to be off this horrid medication. He’s found that listening to me is valuable since I’m such a veteran. The new night time med will have to wait though. I have lowered my regular bedtime med and I seem to be sleeping okay and I’m waking up around 7 or 8. Wow, a whole day to be awake!

Well, the trail has rocks, curves, and u-turns, steep climbs and sudden downhills. I am putting one foot ahead of the other to see what is in store for me.